http://www.news.cornell.edu/stories/april05/slime-mold.bush.cheney.ssl.html

Didn't know whether to put this in OTF, since it is insect related. But figured some would think there might be a political inference, so I felt it best to plop it here. Then again...since politics is persona non grata, it may invoke the "take it elsewhere" mantra by even this placement.

But, hey...it is legit and it is from Cornell U's. website, and it didn't seem to bother Still President Bush or Still Vice President Cheney or Former Sec. of Denfense, Rumsfeld.

It's old news, but I just stumbled on it, so it's new to me. Back in '05, two Cornell University entemologists named three species of slime mold beetles after the aforementioned three stoo...er three men. The new additions to the microherd are: A. bushi Miller and Wheeler, A. cheneyi Miller and Wheeler and A. rumsfeldi Miller and Wheeler, respectively.

(If you knew how many straight lines I passed up on this one.....) **"Rim shot! Ba-dum-bump!"**

They were trying to find two dung beetles to name after Sean Hannity and Rush Limbaugh...but they couldn't find ones that could push enough bull$hit. (Sorry, I couldn't resist at least one shot at someone.)

Well, Linda, the incongruity of the naming confuses me.

(But, boy do I like that word, incongruity: the quality or state of being incongruous

Further:

incongruous: a: not harmonious : incompatible <incongruous colors> b: not conforming : disagreeing <conduct incongruous with principle> c: inconsistent within itself <an incongruous story> d: lacking propriety : unsuitable <incongruous manners)

The relevance of the definitional gobbledygook: the Slime Mold is a harmless (emphasis on the word "harmless") curiosity, though possessing an outwardly revolting appearance. In political terms, though we are discussing biological entities here and definitely not politics, Spiro Agnew was a Slime Mold, revolting, yet harmless. I can not attribute all Slime Mold qualities to the named honorees, however. Revolting, undeniably.

Appealing as it is to describe its appearance (which, for some strange reason I've noticed quite more frequently during the last 7 gardening seaons,) as "Slime Mold," I've found the alternative colloquialism, "Dog Vomit Fungus," to be more in keeping with my reaction to the phenomena even though, technically, it is not a fungus.

Yet, every year, just about this time, just as the National Debt grows in increments to pay for more welfare for the rich and finance the war for another year, I usually see the A. bushi Miller and Wheeler, A. cheneyi Miller and Wheeler and A. rumsfeldi Miller and Wheeler, or their near relatives infesting my garden like another plague of locusts.

It's always hard to determine which Slime Mold (or Dog Vomit) it is so we know which one to swoop down on with a shovel and crush like a bug with shock and awe

Likewise, a visual examination of the nauseating mess on the ground makes us pause in considering if this is the one to throw on the compost heap to rot away with other useless organic matter that never really had any actual usefulness in previous gardens, even among rare quadrenials.

Somehow, though, it's always pretty clear which one to hold up as an example to future gardeners as an example of what we should never fear again, a harmless, insignificant mold which should never have been given a second thought. Though it's appearance is designed to strike terror into the hearts of American Gardeners and it somhow manages to deceive a few, real gardeners can easily see it for the insignificant mold that it is and has always been. Let's not give it any station above that which it's Family deserves, or even its Order, Class, Phylum or Kingdom.

Somewhere between now and Tuesday, November 4th, the Slime Molds that rear their ugly heads in our garden now will be history. Keep the manure fork ready to deal with them should they ever try to rear their ugly heads in the future.

Wayne
(Grateful to be able to finally disuss the fine points of Mycetozoa instead of basing ignorant politicians.)

Well, Wayne, there aren't too many people who could have stimulated me enough to research "Eukaryotes", which sounds like something you do into a microphone on stage at a bar after too many beers.

Thanks for the edumucation. I also have to thank you for elucidating the more apt characterization of dog vomit fungus (slime mold) to A.bushi, A.cheneyi and A.rumsfeldi in regards to their namesakes. As described on this
Dog Vomit Pagethere do seem to be a great many more definitive similarities:

quote:

It's scientific name is Fuligo septica, which, when roughly translated into english means, "Sticky stuff on the bottom of Bob's shoe". (Substitute "Bob" for "Everyman")

It can appear seemingly overnight causing people to question what it is and how it got there.

As it ages, it matures into a harder, larger mass that loses much of its bright attractive color. Although still able to project fear in some people at this stage, it becomes much harder to notice.It can become quite slippery at this stage, too.

During it's slime mold stage it becomes crusty and un-inviting.

Brave souls can pull back the outer layer of the mold to reveal an even darker brown mass hiding inside.

In it final days, it releases its last spores into the atmosphere and onto humans.

There's more metaphors there than even I could shake a proverbial baton at.

Well, Linda, I did later think that Eukayotes was too broad a category and narrowed to down to Mycetozoa, one of 6 groups of Eukayotes. In the interest of being helpful, I edited my post to reflect this, as well as to correct spelling errors. This might help those who are truly interested in delving into the deeper aspects of rhizopod protozoans, whether from red states or elewhere.

quote:

Originally posted by gardenz:
During it's slime mold stage it becomes crusty and un-inviting.

Brave souls can pull back the outer layer of the mold to reveal an even darker brown mass hiding inside.

In it final days, it releases its last spores into the atmosphere and onto humans.

That is what truly scares me. I'm hoping historians can do a complete post-mortem on the A.bushi years in my garden without my having to peer into the heart of darkness.

Wayne

Hah! I learned what a Eukaryote (and a Prokaryote too) was a full three weeks before this thread was started. Boy do I feel smart!

Classy but not surprised.