Whatever, Loamy. It just seems like you enjoy being the victim. Can't recall ever seeing a post where you're pulling up your panties & plan on trying to make something good happen.

Lost ALL your friends & family because of your husband's "threats"? What sort of threats could your husband make that would cancel out ALL friends & family? Murder? Sorry. If it doesn't jell it ain't aspic. And very few of your claims jell. Something else must be going on between YOU & your friends & family to have resulted in 100% ostracism. Have you made ANY efforts to contact ANY of these so-called friends & family to mend fences that you feel you didn't break?

I'm sorry if I sound cynical, but there are always two (if not more) sides to every story, & your stories always outline you as the 100% victim with absolutely NO friends or family not due to any fault of your own, NO public resources to turn to due to no fault of your own, & a husband who's living free & clear of any family responsibility due to no fault of your own.

Again - I don't live in Canada, but find this difficult to believe. Do have a friend who has a friend in Canada. Will have to run your story(ies) by him & see what he has to say.

Breezy, if you can't be helpful or at least be nice...just shut up! Please. Please.
I don't know who appointed you to be the forum BULLY BOY but you do that job well!
Apparently from your lofty post in some kindly relative's basement you think you know everything about the world. You don't. You have no idea and you're just plain mean in saying the things you do. I wouldn't want to be within miles of you when your karma comes home.
Loamy, my heart breaks for you. I've watched a dear one go through much the same struggle with an abusive husband and a disabled child. I have no magic solutions. Just try to find one trustworthy friend and start there. Others will come. You may not feel it now but you are the strong one in this equation. You're not the one breaking down and taking out your frustrations on others by being mean. You're the one who has kept life going for your children---that's strength---given to you freely by the love of your children. My prayers are with you.

Breezy, Loamy has enough problems without you attacking her and blaming her. Your response is cold, cruel and uncompassionate. Can you even see how hurtful your remarks are? If you don't want to participate in something, then don't participate. Trying to prove everyone and everything wrong here is out of line. Your scolding and accusations can't possibly make things any better.

BG, I don't believe Loamy is asking anything of you. Perhaps you're perfect, and therefore judge and throw stones. But me, I'd rather be kind than right.

quote:

Whatever, Loamy. It just seems like you enjoy being the victim. Can't recall ever seeing a post where you're pulling up your panties & plan on trying to make something good happen.

Lost ALL your friends & family because of your husband's "threats"? What sort of threats could your husband make that would cancel out ALL friends & family? Murder? Sorry. If it doesn't jell it ain't aspic. And very few of your claims jell. Something else must be going on between YOU & your friends & family to have resulted in 100% ostracism. Have you made ANY efforts to contact ANY of these so-called friends & family to mend fences that you feel you didn't break?

I'm sorry if I sound cynical, but there are always two (if not more) sides to every story, & your stories always outline you as the 100% victim with absolutely NO friends or family not due to any fault of your own, NO public resources to turn to due to no fault of your own, & a husband who's living free & clear of any family responsibility due to no fault of your own.

Again - I don't live in Canada, but find this difficult to believe. Do have a friend who has a friend in Canada. Will have to run your story(ies) by him & see what he has to say.

holy crap. what did the admin say....just let him know...?

HEH ADMIN - YOU (STILL) GOT A PROBLEM!

and you folks wonder why I left?
unflippingbelievable.

ps: I reported my own post - just because the Admin/Moderators don't have time to read all these messages - sure don't want them to miss me.

I don't wonder why you left, I wonder why you came back. Part of the feeding frenzy?

I've been snooping by now and then to see if Breezy has learned how to behave.

I have my answer.

I sent bp a PM previous;
just sent Eric Hurlock a PM.

I'm a committed organic gardener and I'd enjoy rejoining this group but not when every day I can anticipate sh*t like Breezy is permitted.

oh, and pps, reported this post, too.

Hey - no worries guys. I'm leaving of my own volition & have other sandboxes to play in where - oddly enough - I'm not judged as I am here.

Oh - & for those of you who feel I'm being harsh? Perhaps you need to take the time & peruse the last few "Loamy" threads. The one where she was really ill & needed to go to the ER, & OG was where she had someone looking for assistance? That one is a doozy.

Sorry folks - still think there's more to this story than just Loamy's side, but I leave it to you all.

I have no doubt that I'll be receiving a scathing "buh bye" from bpbikes, who won't be bothered researching the "Loamy Saga", but you know what? Who cares? Not me. I wish the woman well, but still believe she's not doing much to help herself. That's my opinion & I'm entitled to it.

For the rest of you, especially those who know what I'm talking about, even if you don't want to state it publically - HAPPY GARDENING!

(Which was/is what this site was/is "supposed" to be about - not personal drama.)

I think all this is beyond our scope of understanding. Loamy has many issues, most of which she feels helpless to do anything about. I think she needs our positive support. True, we don't know both sides of the story and probably never will.

I only hope, Loamy, that you can find the help you so desperately are seeking.

BG you need to find a way to say what you say without sounding like a self-appointed disciplinarian. Your general observations may be pertinent, but your tone ruins everything.

quote:

Originally posted by BreezyGardener:
That's my opinion & I'm entitled to it.

For the rest of you, especially those who know what I'm talking about, even if you don't want to state it publically - HAPPY GARDENING!

(Which was/is what this site was/is "supposed" to be about - not personal drama.)

At the risk of being shunned by the rest of you I must agree with Breezy - she IS entitled to her opinion, especially if Loamy lays out her entire personal life for everyone to read/comment on.

Loamy seems awfully needy and from the postings I have read and she does not seem to benefit from all of your sympathy and suggestions. I know nothing about Loamy but I think that her problems are way beyond the scope of a gardening forum.

And what's with Wiki? You mean to tell me that you publicly state that you are leaving and then sneak back and lurk around waiting for Breezy to make a comment that you can report? Seems a little sneaky to me.

I don't know about the rest of you but I would personally rather read good gardening comments from someone who is occasionaly nasty than participate in some bad reality show about personal problems.

I 2nd. you brown... Wiki back after all said and all of us who begged Wiki to stay.????? You came back to bash BG, doesn't make sense....You came back for the reason you said you left...

quote:

granny kate said:Breezy, if you can't be helpful or at least be nice...just shut up! Please. Please.
I don't know who appointed you to be the forum BULLY BOY but you do that job well!
Apparently from your lofty post in some kindly relative's basement you think you know everything about the world. You don't. You have no idea and you're just plain mean in saying the things you do. I wouldn't want to be within miles of you when your karma comes home.

In my latest quest to be more tolerant and patient, the other day I cancelled a response prior to actually posting, that I had typed to Loamy that hovered somewhere in between BG's and BR's tones. With my resolve in tact, I came back to peek, and find it crumbling. So after much consideration, and finding I feel both challenged and indignant, here I go again.

That anyone, including WikiLeeks, can be this hard on Breezy for expressing an opinion that differs from yours, is as intolerant and negative as you're saying she is! I have read and re-read both of her responses in this thread, and other than her opening of "Whatever, Loamy" in the second one, she didn't say anything inappropriate or arguable! So because a 'tone of negativity' was set in the first two words of her post, do you really need to react with nasty comments like 'shut up' and name calling?

IMO, Breeezy has made obvious efforts to assuage the 'sensitive' population here by not committing those same behaviors, but it's being totally ignored because of her past. Well, surprise!! Not everyone is going to agree with you just as you don't agree with her, not in any community, not in any household, and you need to accept that knowledge the same as she has.

If you can jump right in to give Loamy comfort, it should be as easy for you to give Breezy credit for her efforts!

I happen to have found Breezy's entire first post says exactly what I'd have said, and her entire second post, minus the aforementioned "Whatever, Loamy," did too. So here we are again, Loamy, except this time in a public forum instead of in a personal e-mail: Find it in yourself to stop playing the blameless victim, and take some responsibility for your circumstances, and make more than verbal efforts to improve them. Also, I don't believe for a minute that Elfie walked away from you simply because of any words spoken by your ex, and I would hope your family wouldn't have exited your presence for such a lame reason either. Do a little reflecting and a little soul-searching and you'll find the answers you need. If not, just ask Breezy or I! We seem to think we know every thing!

Breezy, you are going where you won't be judged? Meaning you get to say and behave in whatever way you want and everyone just shrugs? I don't know where that could possibly be, because attacking people verbally doesn't usually get a shrug out of anyone, even on internet forums. Why don't you have to be responsible for your behavior?

Do you expect people to drop to their knees after you've just berated them and praise you for being the only one who can really see the Truth? To beg for your forgiveness for being to blind and ignorant and they are entirely guilty fools for letting things like this happen to themselves? Do you want credit for smacking them with their behavior as some kind of enlightening experience? Or just what were you expecting anyone's reaction to be to your accusations?

You seem to have been winding up the last couple weeks just looking for a fight. Picking on those of us who just don't garden the way you do is one thing. Picking on people whose lives are causing them pain is entirely another thing. I think your explosion here is because people were being nice to Loamy and you were envious. You just don't like it when others are getting more attention, so trying to prove Loamy wrong and everyone who is treating her humanely ought to put a stop to that, eh? You need to look in your own back yard before you go accusing others of lying and being a victim and all the other accusations you sure seem to have been keeping such close track of for years.

Brownrexxx, maybe life hasn't given you lemons yet, but when bad things happen, and happen on top of each other it feels overwhelming, and rightly or wrongly we often try to go where we have had fun in the past, where we think people will be nice to us to have a break, to get some sense of kinship in life's problems, and she really is running out of places to look for kindness. Clearly this isn't one them.


I thought this was a social forum, not a debate forum. This particular part of this site is about getting to know each other, and where in the world would we ever jump on someone who is down and call them all the names and make all the accusations Breezy makes in a social situation? It's just plain cruel and unnecessary.

If Breezy needs to say this stuff she can say it in private messages to those who want to listen and agree with her. But to post it publicly, directed at Loamy at this particular time in her life, is destructive and insensitive and really is a low point in human interaction.

I think all in all BG did not feel like being yet another enabler. No envy here.