I'm still thinking of you, Alaskan, every day. Ditto what gardenz said.

Ellenr--I very often agree with you and find your comments and data fascinating and spot-on. And I am not going to dispute your facts in this instance either. But I do feel that this thread is not the right place for the debate that may be springing up, or the judgmental feel of the data that is being presented (you probably don't mean for it to sound judgmental... but it does). Drugs or no drugs, a person who is depressed needs wholehearted, enthusiastic, loving support from the people around her.

I've read about studies (I'm being careful here not to claim to have read the studies themselves--just articles about them) that show postpartum depression is much much higher among women who feel a lack of a support network outside her immediate family. And that on the flip side, it is almost non-existent among women who live in highly supportive extended-network situations (like supportive communal living situations, or among loving extended family).

For what it's worth, I think that means that the most important thing alaskan can have from us here is as much loving support as we can offer.

It's late and I'm tired so I don't know that I'm saying what I want to say here... I don't want to contribute to tensions... I just want alaskan to know that she has our full, loving, non-judging support.

I hope you're feeling better, alaskan. I wish I could bring you a warm chicken casserole, give your feet a massage (with lavender-infused corn meal), and then hold your new baby while you sleep. If only it were the thought that counts!

Keep taking care of yourself, however you need to, and keep getting the help you need, and don't forget to ask the people around you for help too.

Blessings,

Heather

Alaskan,
First I must commend you on your bravery for seeking help from others with such a complex, personal, and misunderstood trouble. I suffered mild post partem depression after my first daughter in 2005. However after my 2nd daughter in 2006 I went through a year of very hard and lonely times. My husband tried to help but this is a very isolating illness that can easily make the most competent and independent woman feel helpless and cut off. I breast fed for 4 months with my first and 8 months with my 2nd but found this didn't help or hurt my depression. I finally found that small successes were what helped me most. Being able to look myself in the mirror at the end of the day and say I accomplished one thing even if it was simply doing the dishes, or getting all the laundry put away. So long as I had done one thing I felt I wasn't loosing my control or my mind. My best friend had even worse depression than I. Blessedly I was able to combat my depression with my garden and exercise. However my friend has been taking Zolof to help her in combination with her work. She has been able to decrease her dose while increasing her exercise. I offer my words and story in hope that it helps. I wasn't brave enough to get help at first. When I did seek help from family members I was told to " be happy I had children and shape up". Depression is difficult to combat but the fact you're trying speeks highly of you. Don't discount ANYTHING until you have tried it. I hope your husband continues to support you. I know it's hard for men to understand the chemical stew that pregnancy creates inside of women, and the fact it doesn't just go away when the pregnancy is over. I will keep you in my prayers.

Sending good vibes your way, Alaskan.

Max sends doggy kisses.

Alaskan:

I am living proof that depression medication works. Whether your depression is short-lived or not, it's a chemical thing and nothing you can control - any more than you would be able to control diabetes without insulin. After taking depression meds for three years I weaned myself off (thinking I knew more than my doctor) and it took only 2 weeks before I was in that "black hole" once again. And, like you, I have too many people that depend on me to wallow there for long. I take my depression medication every morning. It makes it possible for me to care for all those who depend on me....and allows me to enjoy my life. I thank God every day for these meds.

I really appreciate all of the sweet comments you'll have made. Reading the kind and supportive comments has been very helpful.


gardenz, that is exactly what I needed. Aunt Honey, thanks so much for saying that.

I feel like I need some giant "you really are a good person, and your choices are good, you will make it through this"

I was going to thank each of you personally, but there were so many really helpful and supportive responses I couldn't thank each of you.

But it means so much to me, every single positive and supportive response is so helpful. It truly helps give me strength. I just read through them again and again and realize that there are people out there who have been through this, who care about me, who are supportive of my choices, who worry about me, and are sure that I will make it through this.

Thank you.

Alaskan,

Know that you are in my thoughts and prayers...know that you are loved and the all is well.

Do whatever you can to feel better...and do one little pampering thing for yourself every day, hell, maybe twice a day...you are worth it!

You are loved

Peace

Gail

Me too - I'm late to the party. I am so sorry to hear that you're going through this and I'm sending my love and support.

I want to call everyone's attention to a UCLA study on female friendships and their role in stress. Rather than "fight or flight" responses in men, the researchers identified a "tend and befriend" tendency in women.

Lacking good female friends means we don't have an outlet for our stress, and is actually detrimental to our physical health too. To read more, here's an article on the research.

http://www.annieappleseedproject.org/femrestostre.html

Been following this thread and not quite sure what to say other than wishing you well with prayers.

Dirt

quote:

Originally posted by alaskan:

I feel like I need some giant "you really are a good person, and your choices are good, you will make it through this"

I was going to thank each of you personally, but there were so many really helpful and supportive responses I couldn't thank each of you.

But it means so much to me, every single positive and supportive response is so helpful. It truly helps give me strength. I just read through them again and again and realize that there are people out there who have been through this, who care about me, who are supportive of my choices, who worry about me, and are sure that I will make it through this...

All of this and more, Alaskan. When your hormone levels (mainly progesterone) drop so dramatically after giving birth it inhibits serotonin uptake in the brain. Low serotonin levels make you feel abaout as tall as a flea with issues! Many times it goes away eventually, but I am so glad that there is medication that will take care of this problem a bit faster. As much as I hate to admit it, regular exercise also helps to raise serotonin levels. I use them both plus I think fish oil helps me, too. I'm afraid mine is a lifelong struggle, but fortunately post partum depression can be treated with a relatively short course of medication without further need to continue.

I see you as a strong woman who is doing what she needs to do to take care of herself and her family. Because you dared to share, you have friends on this forum that you don't even know that are pulling for you, I'll bet.

Big SC hugs and warmth are coming your way from me to you. (((((((Alaskan)))))))))

I'm with Jenniferch on this one. There most definitely is such a thing as chemical imbalance. I have been taking SSRIs for more than 7 years. These medications have quite literally saved my life.

What gardenz said.

Alaskan, I hope you're feeling better. The literature says it takes about 4-6 weeks to fully experience the benefits of SSRIs (if that's what was prescribed).

How old is the baby now, btw? I remember when you were posting about your pregnancy. It didn't seem that long ago.

One of my sisters-in-law had post-partum depression. She was pretty blue, too. She got through it with help, just like you are. I echo everyone else who commends you for getting the help you deserve. God bless.

Hi Alaskan, I just got my computer back from the shop and just now saw this post.

Hugs to you dear friend.((((Alaskan)))) If I lived nearby, I'd be right there with Heatherhead, bringing you a casserole and taking some of the kids out to play for awhile.

I've been where you're at and I'm so glad to hear you were smart enough to get help and that have found something that is working for you.

I went thru post-partum depression after my third child was born, wouldn't admit I had a problem,and wouldn't get help. That's not a good way to live. Like you Alaskan, I lived in a remote area and had no close friends anywhere around. Sadly enough, I barely have any memories of that daughter before age one. I think the only thing that saved my sanity was that at that point I had to get a job in town to make ends meet. Probably wouldn't be here today if it hadn't been for that.

Anyway, I just want you to know you'll be in my prayers and if you ever need to just chat or blow off steam or whatever, feel free to e-mail. I know what it's like living with a house full of children.

(((((Alaskan)))))
It sounds like you're getting the help you need. Also, whenever you can get decent sleep, I'm sure that will make a big difference.

It sounds like you are isolated because you are out in the middle of nowhere. Thank goodness for cyberspace, because even though I don't live in a remote area, it's still very easy to get isolated. Still, I wish we all lived close enough that we could stop by with goodies or go out for coffee.

Don't want to get into any debate on meds, chemical imbalances, etc., at least not in this thread.

--J--

Let me get this straight.

You live in Alaska on the Kenai Peninsula; the Kenai, Kasilof and Russian rivers are FULL of silvers, and you're depressed!!!

Man, I am NEVER, do you hear me, EVER going to have a baby!

Cheers Alaskan. I haven't see a post in a bit. How's it going? Have you been able to see past your current situation? I hope so, and if not, please believe that you will. If not today, then soon. If it's any help, I was in the pit of despair once and made my way out. I wasn't able to think past the next hour or so, but kept going by sheer will.